So much relationship advice out there + yet so many unhappy relationships… So what gives?
We are missing an essential aspect of happy relationship creation + this blog is all about what it is and how to access it.
I have a super happy marriage…now.
But my husband, Ian + I struggled to see eye-to-eye, to understand each other truly and to feel deep levels of trust for over a decade.
I loved him, was attracted to him, but we often were at odds.
Because we were in DEFAULT patterns and focusing on what we did NOT want!!
Women ask me WHY they are NOT getting what they want – whether it is attracting a soul mate or making their current relationship even better even though they are in counselling, reading every self-help book on the shelf and trying, trying, trying to get through.
So, here’s the best relationship success tip I can offer you ==>
BE CLEAR ON WHAT YOU WANT!
Why You Aren’t Getting What You Want
Sounds simple, but the truth is many of us have no idea what we want.
We actually focus on what we DON’T want or DON’ T HAVE in our relationship and life.
And we like to prove ourselves right so we just keep telling these stories and making them true.
Law of Attraction likes to prove your right too so it will keep giving you what you focus upon…and then you say, “See he is a jerk-face or all the great men are married or gay.”
What’s Blocking My Clarity?
We may be tired out, overworked + fed up so creating what we do wants feels so hard!
We are also use to things beings hard.
We almost don’t believe that we can create with ease + that Universal Laws really are in acting at all times.
One student said to me: “It freaked me out how fast things changed + I got what I want when I got really clear + really started to focus. ”
Where we put our focus expands + we can create real success with ease and grace, fast, when we shift our focus to what we DO want.
But sometimes we develop habits of thought and even emotions that block us from focusing on what we do want.
So notice if:
- You are simply going through the motions day-to-day while hoping + praying that things will somehow get better or at least not get worse while still complaining about things but not taking action. And why?
- You are creating by “default” patterns and stories that you inherited from our parents or past lovers and consider what your resistance is to releasing these.
- You have bought into the cultural story that relationships are hard and men + women are from different planets and what it serves in you to keep telling this story.
What I Want, Really, Really Want
Many of us also never learned that we have the permission to even think about what we want never mind actually create it or demand it.
It can feel almost naughty or selfish to be clear on what we want, but all creative manifestation starts with a DESIRE or a WANT.
So you have permission from all of the fairies of the Universe, the Great Mother, your ancestral line and even that boy in third grade who was mean to you to get clear on what you want…
- What is NOT working for me in my relationship + sex life?
- If I could have it another way, how would I like it to be?
- Why is that important to me?
- If I had that, how would I imagine I would feel?
- Who would I BE as a woman / wife / mother / friend / creator if I had all I desired?
You don’t have to figure out the HOW. Let the Universe take care of the how and when.
You just need to allow yourself to be in your YES…be in your clarity of desire and your knowing of what you want.
In my marriage when I shifted my focus to what I did WANT + away from what I didn’t want, not only did my energy towards my husband shift + his in return, but I started to see the manifestations of that desire, fast.
Like overnight fast!
Be courageous + daring to get clear on what you do want, woman.
The Universe and your lover wants to give it to you!
Share your insights, aha’s and WANTS in The Relationship Secrets Facebook Group.
We are also continuing the circle on how to create conscious relationships for spiritual women over at the The Rich Relationship Secrets Facebook page.
ABOUT SHASTA: Best-selling author, award winning teacher and down-to-earth Canadian girl, Shasta Townsend is your “marriage mechanic” who helps you manifest your relationship dream by teaching you how to apply Universal Laws to create a rich and satisfying relationship, no matter what AND the practical day-to-day tools that can change everything! Shasta is one of the first teachers to combine the teachings of Quantum Physics, Law of Attraction, Spiritual Psychology and good old common sense in the area of marriage, love and intimacy. Her many student’s success speak to the power of her work, and her own story is one of amazing “miracles”. She is here as the helping hand you’ve been seeking. Learn more at www.shastatownsend.com
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