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Stop Telling Me to Love Myself More

dsc_1262I am so tired of hearing that women “need to love themselves more”.

Stop judging our level of self love as some sort of barometer for success, love-ability or worthiness as a woman.

Of course, we have moments when we may hate the way our butt looks, wish we had had that witty repartee or knew how to fold napkins in the form of cranes to astound our dinner guests, but assuming that we hate ourselves is so tiring.

It sets up the assumption that we can NOT receive love until we have some sort of overflowing bucket of self-love to validate it first.

It’s shite!

And impossible…

For Love is our nature…

We can’t ever NOT be connected to love, for love is our internal nature (Essence, Spirit, Soul, Atman).

It’s who we are + is the basis of the Universe we live in.  All else is false.

WE ARE LOVE. It’s that simple.

So, rather than assuming we don’t love themselves, let’s consider, “What’s blocking this internal nature instead?”

One thing could be the very belief that we DON’T love ourselves, along with all the other stories of unworthiness we have ALL accepted at some level.

It is OK to have moments of self-doubt and maybe even self loathing as we mix it up in life, but don’t let anyone tell you to love yourself more.

They may mean well but really this is a huge projection of judgment + criticism.

It sets us up for more self loathing too.
We are a failure who can’t even love herself!

How will we ever love anyone else?

Or how will they ever love us? We are total failures!


So how do we create more love for ourselves + in our lives?

dsc_4502Give love away like the sun gives away light – with no agenda, no attachment, no worries.

Many times we love with a hidden “need” – we want our  lover or friends to reflect our own value back at us and this is impossible (not to mention extremely dangerous as we tread into the waters of co-dependency + disempowerment.)

So we are told we need to love ourselves first in order for another to see that we are worthy of loving.

But love is not a commodity…It is a river and it is ALWAYS flowing to you, beautiful woman.

So today when you have that moment of self-doubt, self-hate, self-loathing, notice that + look for someone or something + flow love to THEM.   Feel gratitude. See beauty. Feel the loveliness of loving.

And know your true state as one of love…

Big love to you,



Your Thoughts…

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Best-selling author, award winning teacher and down-to-earth Canadian girl, Shasta Townsend is your “marriage mechanic” who helps you manifest your relationship dream by teaching you how to apply Universal Laws to create a rich and satisfying relationship, no matter what AND the practical day-to-day tools that can change everything! Shasta is one of the first teachers to combine the teachings of Quantum Physics, Law of Attraction, Spiritual Psychology and good old common sense in the area of marriage, love and intimacy. Her many student’s success speak to the power of her work, and her own story is one of amazing “miracles”. She is here as the helping hand you’ve been seeking. Learn more at www.shastatownsend.com

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